“Well, we’ll have to do a bachelor party, right?” A tense and uncomfortable silence is installed in any conversation when someone proposes it. It can happen for two reasons. The first, because the idea that we have internalized about bachelor parties is somewhat archaic, and there are those who flinch when someone even thinks of raising it. The second, because those involved are eager to prepare one, and they know it is going to get messy. Believe it or not, these celebrations are still the order of the day in the months and weeks leading up to a wedding, and it may be surprising how common it is to do it the old-fashioned way, with the stripper and sex as the essential ingredient.
But is the way we celebrate bachelor parties changing or is that stale ideology of marriage still valid as a condemnation? Does couples usually worry about what may happen to them? What can and cannot be done? Now that we are in the middle of the wedding season.
What most intrigues us. Why is the oldest conception of bachelor parties still so present in our imagination? Where does it come from? “Before, marriage was seen as a rite after which your life changed and you lost some freedom, and that concept has persisted when it comes to throwing a party to celebrate the transition from singleness to married life,” explains Amparo. “This is not always the case. It is clear that getting married does not imply stopping living things, neither your personal life nor your social relationships.”
“Everything is undergoing an evolution in which the sexual component disappears. It is a party, a weekend, a trip to share with friends …”, recalls Calandín. And what we have matured in our way of conceiving the couple has a lot to do with it. “Generally, you already have relationships prior to marriage, so that the taboo around the erotic is no longer there. And now there are also couples who have encounters with other people, in a consensual way by the members of the relationship. Everything has changed” Elena contributes.
We finish with some final recommendations: what should you ask yourself if you are one of those who are concerned about your partner’s bachelor party? “If it is insecurity or lack of confidence, if you are not calm in the moments before your wedding, think if the relationship is going well enough. And if it is an unfounded fear, do not anticipate, trust your partner if he has not given you reasons to the contrary “. “We must reflect on what leads us to distrust, and if we have doubts, let’s talk with our partners. It is the best anxiolytic.”
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